!!!

Doesn't it sometimes suck when ur brain's working in a zillion directions at the same time? sometimes a person can become too self-judging to a really crippling extent ... that person would definitely be me ...
the main struggles right now are just not related, at least as to me. I'm not happy with my performance in studying ... i'm just not studying. been feeling sleepy all day and the logical thing to do for someone who has studying as a priority is to just sleep for a while and wake up to study right? well ... in my case it hasn't been quite so. i have been up just wasting time doing absolutely nothing of any use. i played on my bro's playstation, i've watched a couple of episodes from sex and the city and went for a walk to smoke a cigarrette. and now i'm here doing nothing but sitting online and writing on my blog. why can't i prioratise it right? that's still a mystery to be solved.
good thing is ... i think i regained my ability to feel cold again :) ... started feeling it yesterday.
second thing i guess would be my lovelife. i was happy the past period when i didn't have it upfront, focusing on anything but ... and so on but somehow with things going well again with ayat, it seems i'm back again. i'm acting like everything else revolves around the matter ... well actually i'm not really acting but things are going that way out of my own will ... can't i ever show any sense of control over things? shouldn't i feel in control over my life and shouldn't i be running it myself?? well that again is another mystery to be solved.
my dear hayek, you still need some work ...